Monday, April 2, 2012

The pain never goes away

Certainly over the years I have heard the same dogmas about autism and asbergers syndrome over the last few years. Speculation has been abounds of what has caused the issue of autism. The diagnostic criteria is hogwash. Our educational system has failed us, our “therapists” have failed us, and above all, the people responsible for this tragedy are hiding on plain site with six figure incomes as well as jobs so they can were a suit and a tie and have some job that privides themselves meaning. I am here to set the record straight to those who have lied to so many. You know who you are. Stop hurting the most bright people in our society. Stop damaging the young and the ones who want to persuit their dreams. You are liers. You are robbers, and above all, you are disgraceful. Hey I’m talking to you. That’s right, doctors, therapists, lawyers, teachers, and above all “public education.” You had the audacity to sit my grandparents down and tell them I was cognitively deficient. Then you diagnosed me with ADD. Then you put me on Ritalin. Really?!? Drugs help? How dare you! How dare you take away my soul. How dare you! If I knew what I know now, I would make it my mission in life to see to it that people like you are no longer able to hurt people. Ms. Bruski a lady that I got to know in my elementary, middle, and high school years, told me lies. I say that because instead of helping me or even noticing my non conformist mentality, I was forced to live in denial about what I was: a genius. Yes I am saying that because I am not afraid to say it. Who are you to decide who wins and who loses in life. I guess I am not appreciating anything. No, I am simply suggesting that enhance people’s abilities. Instead of making them rot, in perpetuality. Who made you the policeman of my mind anyway. I write differently than everybody! So What! I talk differently than everybody! So WHAT! I am sick of everyone talking about the same stuff over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over. The autistic child is that way because he or she was given a life of difference not because god made them that way, because that is a gift. I am not a robot for corporate America. I am not their servant. Let me set that record straight right now. How dare you damage children! How dare you take the childs life away. I remember when I was in elementary school and I remember my first day in kindergarden. I had just gotten out of U of M hospital from kidney failure, and the one thing I can say from that experience was it scared me. The teacher I had scared me. My fellow collagues in the classroom scared me, and above all the entire first day of school is still on my mind. It live with me all the time. Like the scar on my stomach and right arm from the hospital. Yeah, my experience with exotic pets, small turtles. Yeah, e coli bacteria. The problems then began to get worse throughout the six years I was in elementary school. I was bullied all the time. Threatened all the time and called names of all kinds. To all those who suggest that it is okay. Take a look in the mirror and see how your own life has ended up. I can even remember when I was in the middle of a sn
     The idea is that I have been through every form of mental help you could think of. I have suffered through the physical, the menta-physical, the psychological, and back. All of this has a lot to do with my teachers from public educatuin. Ms. Papajohn, Mrs. Savage, Ms. Johns, Ms. Bruski, and all the other teachers I had throughout my high school days. You all have tried to help me and have in a lot of ways failed. The years that I have been in college, I have been told that I am supposed to be learning a lot more in the world. I see that a lot of what I have been told about myself has been a lie. snowy day at school and the floor was slippery. I fell and the entire hall way laughed. You see I walk with a slight limp. I broke my leg when I was 2 years of age. I was bullied because I used to run very slowly. Not to mention the stigma on the playground. I am speaking about this now, because I think it is very important to shine light on the issue of autism. The so called disorder needs to be looked at more and researched more. Support systems need to be updated and closely looked at for the betterment for the individual who suffers from the its effects. A lot of teachers openly lied to me. Lied to my mother, lied to my family. To them I just hope nothing bad happens to you in your life. Because the amount of suffering I have had to endure will never be forgiven. The issue has come full circle in that I have been diagnosed with Asbergers syndrome.

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